"You had me at 'Fuck you.'" The H-Bomb: James Bonomo (Sylvester Stallone) is a hit-man based in New Orleans who, along with his partner of six years, carries out a hit on some coked up no-neck in a swanky hotel suite. Things get a bit messy, but, at the end of day, the job gets done and they hit a nearby watering hole to unwind. When Bonomo heads to the … [Read more...] about Bullet to the Head
Cosmopolis
Say what, David? The H-Bomb: 28-year-old Wall Street billionaire Eric Packer (Robert Pattinson) is in for one hell of a day. His latest investment proved to be a not so wise one, as he stands to lose his entire fortune, and his security detail has just informed him that a credible threat has been made against his life. Upon receiving all this wonderful … [Read more...] about Cosmopolis
Dredd
Justice is served. The H-Bomb: Some time in the not so far off future, nuclear war has radiated most of United States (a set-up that never gets old), and people have been forced to live in walled-in Mega-Cities. Mega-City One, which stretches from what used to be Boston to what used to be Washington D.C., has a population of 800 million inhabitants, and the … [Read more...] about Dredd
Texas Chainsaw 3D
The saw is family... The H-Bomb: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre series has to be one of the most confusing, disjointed franchises in the history of cinema. Not because the movies are hard to follow, but because there is, for the most part, no continuity from film to film. First, there was Tobe Hooper's 1974 masterpiece, which few will dispute is one of the … [Read more...] about Texas Chainsaw 3D
Total Recall (The Crappy Version)
A Total Dud The H-Bomb: From Hollywood super-hack Len Wiseman, he who is responsible for the duller-than-dogshit Underworld and the dickless Die Hard 4, comes the latest why-did-they-fucking-bother remake, Total Recall, which takes away all the fun, gory, campy awesomeness of the Paul Verhoeven/Arnold Schwarzenegger classic and replaces it with pure, unadulterated … [Read more...] about Total Recall (The Crappy Version)
