Decent but forgettable
Directed by: Aaron Nee, Adam Nee
Written by: Seth Gordon, Oren Uziel, Adam Nee
Cast: Sandra Bullock, Channing Tatum, Daniel Radcliffe
Swift shot: Basically Romancing the Stone for millennials. An underwhelming romantic action comedy that is best watched without seeing any of the trailers. It’s criminal to allow major cameos and gags to be shown in your trailers, especially when there isn’t much else going for your movie. Let’s assume you didn’t see any trailers, and I will write my review pretending that I didn’t too.
Sandra Bullock plays Loretta Sage, a successful romance novelist who has been struggling to keep writing after the death of her husband. She comes across as a bit unlikeable at first, as her adoring fans flock to her stories and her hunky, dashing leading man, Dash who is basically this generation’s Fabio. See, to help sell her books over the years, her publicist hired a cover model, Alan (Tatum) who really takes to the part of Dash.
Thing is, Loretta is over Dash, she’s over writing crappy romance novels to secretly teach people about the wonder and history of ancient cultures. Her desire lies there, not in peddling passion to perverts. So this will be her final book tour, and this will be the final page for Dash.
Naturally, Alan is not too thrilled about this, but he can’t quite put into words how he truly feels about everything without coming across as an idiot. Words are not his forte, but he’s not stupid.
Meanwhile, a nefarious elite maniac, Fairfax (Radcliffe) kidnaps Loretta and forces her to help him find a lost treasure. Like I said, Romancing the Stone. Granted, Fairfax makes a hell of an entrance and has a sweet ride to abscond Loretta with – and he slings a mean cheese board.
What follows is a mildly amusing effort by her publicist, Beth (Da’Vine Joy Randolph) and Alan to get her back. Alan books a flight out to Isla Something or Other, and he enlists the help of an ex-Navy SEAL to get Loretta back. Things don’t go well, and the rescue is botched. Now Loretta and Alan have to survive the jungle, avoid Fairfax and his minions, and fight off major, mounting sexual tension between them.
As they make their way back to civilization, Loretta can’t help but continue the pursuit of the elusive treasure that Fairfax is after. And that’s the movie.
I liked a lot of what The Lost City had to offer, the chemistry between Tatum and Bullock was decent. Tatum has certainly grown into his own, as they say. And Bullock sparkles in her ridiculous sequenced revealing jumpsuit.
The action is intense and brutal where you might catch yourself wincing – I know I did for a few of the fights. Plus, we get an evil Harry Potter . . . complete with beard and all. I think this is the first time I have seen Radcliffe attempt being a villain. He comes across as a believable character, albeit a bit one-dimensional.
What didn’t work for me was the predictability of it all. I knew pretty much lock-step what was coming, and I wasn’t wrong. Again, I had the misfortune of watching the trailer – but even without that detrimental “benefit,” it was clear how things were going to turn out.
Also, some of the dialog of the supporting cast was just inane and pointless. There’s one scene in particular where a character has to persuade people to help, and I felt like it was written by a mediocre middle-schooler. And a lot could have been cut from the almost two hour run time for what should have been a nice, tight ninety rom-com-action flick.
I do hope to see Bullock and Tatum in more stuff, though, because they have this odd connective tissue going for them that could really work nicely in the right movie. The Lost City was a good start, and maybe we will get a superior sequel from this pair – but you can bet I will be avoiding the trailer!
