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Film Grouch

Film Grouch

Back in my day, films were great. What happened?

I Spit on Your Grave 2

October 16, 2013 by H-Man 0 Comments

1.7/5 - (3 votes)

I spit on this movie.

I Spit On Your Grave 2, Set Photography - Day14

The H-Bomb: Naive Midwestern girl, Katie (Jemma Dallender), is an aspiring model trying to make it in NYC, and isn’t having much luck. After being told that her portfolio is a bit too… rustic, she decides it’s time to get some new photos. Problem is, professional photographs are just so damn expensive. But, fortune smiles on Katie, as she happens upon an ad for free photos from an up and coming photographer, in exchange for her modeling services.

So, Katie shows up to the shoot to find that it’s being run by three Eastern Eurotrash creeps. Any sensible girl would have turned and left the second she heard those sinister accents coming out of their mouths, but Katie really needs these pictures, so she sticks around. It’s only when the photographer asks Katie to remove her clothes for some ‘nudie’ shots that she finally catches on to how obviously shady these Bulgarian fucks are and leaves.

Before Katie can plan her next move, modeling wise, one of the Eastern European goons shows up at her apartment, and after some back and forth, he beats her up and rapes her. Then, next thing she knows, she’s chained up in some dank, disgusting dungeon, where the other two guys from the photoshop show up, and take turns raping her. Then a complete stranger shows up, and he rapes her, as well.

This wild n’ crazy rape romp goes on for what feels like an eternity, then Katie manages to escape, only to find that she is far, far away from home. But, truth be told, Katie isn’t so interested in going home just yet. See, all those days (or perhaps, weeks), of getting rammed, reamed, and rodded have left our leading lass a tad pissed, and she is just yearning for some payback. Some sweet, violent payback. And if you think I’m spoiling too much here, then tough shit, because I’m really doing you a favor by taking away whatever reason you might have for subjecting yourself to the insufferable waste of celluloid that is I Spit on Your Grave 2.

Good God, never, in the four and a half years that I’ve been a critic, have I ever swung so wildly from one extreme to the other. No more than a day after I reviewed what is hands down the best film I’ve seen this year, I find myself watching this anal sludge. I won’t say that I Spit on Your Grave 2 is the very worst film of 2013, as that honor still goes to Movie 43, but damn does it come close.

I Spit on Your Grave 2 is a thematic sequel to the 2010 I Spit on Your Grave, which itself is a remake of the infamous 70’s exploitation flick, Day of the Woman. I say that it’s a thematic sequel, because while none of the characters from the previous movie appear in this one, it is essentially about the same thing, a woman being brutally assaulted and taking revenge in the most gruesome ways imaginable. Though the 2010 film was no great shakes, it is a fucking masterpiece in comparison to this vile, ugly, monotonous dreck.

Whereas the first movie had a rape sequence that was lengthy, this one has several of them that make up the bulk of the film. Director Steven R. Monroe, who helmed the earlier film, doesn’t seem content with just giving us more of the same, he wants to give us a lot more of the same, subjecting his young lead actress to endless amounts of torture and degradation, over and over and over again, making us the audience suffer right along with her, to the point where we finally become numb to it all. Monroe appears to truly relish the non-stop cruelty he inflicts on this girl, and to that I say, fuck him and his movie.

Speaking of the lead actress, I really do feel horrible for Jemma Dallender, not just for what she has to endure at the hands of this sadistic prick of a filmmaker, but also because she is obviously a talented actor who is giving a much better performance than the movie deserves. She really is quite good, and admirably fearless, it’s just a shame that her skills are completely wasted in this filth. I can only hope that someday she will find a more worthy showcase.

And with that, I really don’t have much more to say about I Spit on Your Grave 2. It’s an extremely unpleasant, agonizingly dull, and stupefyingly repetitive pile of dogshit that is about as entertaining as a colonoscopy. There is no good reason for this movie to exist, nor is there any reason whatsoever for you to see it. Maybe I’m sounding like Roger Ebert when he went on his tirade against the original Day of the Woman so many years ago. I didn’t agree with him, but I now can understand how he felt. This is a detestable motion picture that has taken 106 minutes of my life that I will never get back. Please, I implore you, do not make the same mistake I did!

Filed Under: Complete Shit, Horror

About H-Man

A retarded wizard in the forest. Is a staunch fan of Uwe Boll and Rob Schneider, and thinks that Pia Zadora is the bestest actress ever. Loves to eat live puppies.
Twitter: @TheHmanTweeteth

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