Rick Swift says, “The ninja appears to be back . . . “
The H-Bomb: A martial arts trained assassin wages a one man war against his former clan and his master. Let the bloodbath begin…
“Ninja Assassin” can be best described as a martial arts movie fan’s wet dream. It’s blood and guts galore stuffed full of fistfights, sword fights and knife fights in a plot that’s there simply to get us from one violent action scene to another. The opening sequence is an all out slaughter at a Yakuza hang out that lets the audience know exactly what they’re in for… one kick ass, crazy as fuck all ride!
Seriously, this flick is so Goddamn wild it’s exhausting at times. There isn’t a single thing it doesn’t go for, violence wise. Anything that can be done to a human body with a sharpened instrument is demonstrated in this flick; decapitations, half-capitations, bodies being cut in half at the waist, torsos cut in half diagonally, arms chopped off, legs chopped off, blades through the throat… during most of the mayhem all you see are severed limbs flying around the screen. This shit makes “Kill Bill, Vol. 1” look like Dora the Explorer! At the end of one lengthy battle, our hero, Raizo (Rain), looks like he was dropped into a meat grinder.
Director James McTeiguegot to flex his action muscles a little with the terrific “V for Vendetta”, but here he really pulls out all the stops and gives us an action film that’s as over the top as it is entertaining. The film’s outlandish style and excessive bloodletting reminded me a little of “Punisher: War Zone”, only this movie is not nearly as stupid.
Raizo is a warrior who was taken into a secret clan as a young boy and trained as a Ninja by the clan’s brutal master, Ozunu (Sho Kosugi). That’s what the clan does, takes in orphans and trains them ultimately to be hired out as assassins. It’s a secret practice, that, as legend has it, has been going on for a thousand years. Raizo quickly becomes Ozunu’s favorite pupil, but when Ozunu executes a female student who had befriended Raizo, Raizo turns on his clan and vows revenge. Meanwhile, Mika (Naomie Harris), is a young investigator with EuroPol, who is convinced that this clan exists and is quickly closing in on them. The clan knows she’s on to them, so it isn’t long before they send someone after her.
That’s really all that needs to be said about the plot. It’s the kind of thing you’ll find in dozens of martial arts films. Korean star Rain is perfect as the stoic, silent hero. His fighting skills speak for themselves and he has charisma to spare. He’s the kind of indestructible, take-anything-that’s-thrown-at-him hero that only exists in the movies. Harris, who’s never looked hotter on film, does fine in what is essentially the damsel in distress role. Her character isn’t completely helpless, mind you, but when the fighting starts, there isn’t much for her to do but stand back and let Raizo do his thing. The standout, though, is Sho Kosugi as the stone cold Ozunu. He’s a villain with his own warped set of ethics and principles. A sort of Mr. Miyagi with a sadistic streak. Kosugi was a staple of Ninja films back in the 80’s, and he comes back with a vengeance with this menacing performance.
As much as I enjoyed this film, I do have a few issues with it. The editing in some of the action scenes suffered from “Batman Begins”/”Quantum of Solace” syndrome, which is to say they were cut together so quickly and chaotically that it was often difficult to tell what was happening. The fact that the lighting was very dark in these scenes didn’t help matters either. There were times where I felt like I was about to have an epileptic seizure trying keep up with what I was seeing. Another problem was that some of the blood spurts were obviously CGI in places, which always pulls me out of the movie. I also feel I should point out that the violence is fucking BRUTAL, so much so that it induces winces in places. Like I said, “Kill Bill” seemed tame in comparison. Far be it from me to complain about something like that, but, a surprising amount of the violence involves children, which even put me off a little.
But, all bitching aside, I must say I had a blast with this movie. It’s a fun, wild, balls out, very R-rated action flick that any friend of the genre will love… so long as they check their brain at the door.
