"Either she's dead or asleep with the PMS runs." Detective Akeem Swift shot: Dear God, what did I just watch? It was like watching a porn parody, but with worse dialogue and acting. At least with a porn parody, there is some sex between the terribly ridiculous story-telling. You know those disclaimers they have at the end of every film? "The characters and events … [Read more...] about Hit Team
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McFarland, USA
Directed by: Niki Caro Cast: Kevin Costner, Maria Bello, Carlos Pratts, Morgan Saylor, Martha Higareda, Valente Rodriguez, Vanessa Martinez, Chris Ellis, Johnny Ortiz, Hector Duran, Sergio Avelar, Michael Aguero, Rafael Martinez and Ramiro Rodriguez I love a good underdog story. Also like a great sports story. If you combine the two and base it on true events I like it even … [Read more...] about McFarland, USA
What We Do In the Shadows
"Do you want to poke her?" Swift shot: Dry, dark and not half bad, this New Zealand mockumentary featuring everyone's favorite Minion, Jemaine Clement, offers up a few delightful morsels. If you are a fan of Flight of the Conchords, you'll dig this (pun intended) dark comedy that pokes fun (I can't be stopped) at the vampire craze. Shot as a documentary by a New … [Read more...] about What We Do In the Shadows
VANish
Tits and tires, gonna cost you! Swift shot: There are films that flatter returning war veterans, VANish is not one of them. Despite that fact, I enjoyed the ride. Yes, I will try (and fail miserably) to avoid obvious allusions to road trip flicks, but what you get with VANish is what initially appears to be a Bang Bus horror/parody that rapidly develops into a more … [Read more...] about VANish
Maps to the Stars
“Do you know what Hell is? A world without narcotics.” The H-Bomb: There was a time when I considered David Cronenberg to be one of my top three favorite filmmakers. Much like my other favorite director named David, he makes dark, challenging films that are provocative, disturbing, and at times just downright disgusting. Ten years ago, I would have sworn that Cronenberg … [Read more...] about Maps to the Stars
